Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Only in Horseshoes


"U.S.: Raid almost netted Iraqi terror leader"


That's like close.

But better.

How do things that almost happen get headline news? "Plane almost crashes - But it's okay now" Almost doesn't cut it in life. Could you imagine telling your boss "I almost made deadline." What would his reply be? "Great job, Joe Buttonpusher! Almost is good enough for me!" Or telling your wife "I was almost faithful to you." Would she respond "At least you tried, Dear"


So why is it okay that almost news is headline. I think we, as a people, are supposed to get worked up about this almost, because when they almost catch him, they almost catch Bin Laden. And when we almost catch Bin Laden, we can almost pull out of Afghanistan. Almost.

That's like close.

But not really.


lauren e said...

i almost quit smoking last week.
i almost did some work today.
i almost got out of bed on time.
i almost had breakfast instead of coffee this morning.
i almost drank 8 glasses of water today.

and you are telling me that all that doesnt even count? man...

Mike said...

Didn't you hear? I'm ALMOST pregnant!