One more, then I'll stop, I promise!

Once upon a time, in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six days.  Eventually, Michael the archangel found him resting on the seventh day.

"God, where have you been??" he asked.

God smiled and sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction as he pointed down through the clouds.  "Look, Michael, look what I've made."

Michael looked puzzled and asked "What is it?"

"It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put life on it.  I'm going to call it Earth, and it's going to be a place of great balance."

"Balance?" inquired Michael, looking confused.

God explained, pointing to different parts of the Earth "For example, Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth, while Africa is going to be poor.  The Middle East over there will be a hotspot for turmoil."  God continued, pointing to different countries "This one will be hot, and this one will be very cold and covered with ice."

Michael, impressed by Gods work, pointed to a land mass with the ocean at its border and asked "What is that one?"

"Ahh," said God, "that is the Jersey Shore, the most glorious place on Earth.  There are beautiful beaches, rivers, lakes and climate.  The people from the Jersey Shore are intelligent, beautiful and humorous.  They will be extremely sociable, high-achieving people, and they will be known throughout the land as diplomats and carriers of peace."

Michael gasped in wonder and admiration, but soon exclaimed "What about balance, God?  You said there would be balance!  Everyone and everything seems so totally perfect in this place you call the Jersey Shore!"

God replied wisely "Wait until you see the assholes Im sending down from Philly and New York every summer!"