Courtesy of Amie

"One day, long, long ago, there lived a woman who did not whine, nag, or bitch.

But it was a long time ago & it was just that one day.

The End"

 

Things my husband does

Just to aggravate me:

And, as if this priceless facial hair debacle wasn't enough, he walked around all day, singing the theme from Shaft.

Cooking with Saki

Hi kids!!!  Today we are going to make Voodoo Brownies.  "What a funny name for brownies!" you might think.  Yes, it is a funny name for brownies.  My favorite recipes are given to me by friends, and this is no exception.  

This gem was given to me by a lovely and dear friend who lived in Louisiana at the time.  Being a friendly kind of lady, she made a big batch of brownies for her neighbors, only to be accused by one of them of trying to put a voodoo hex on them.  And so, Voodoo Brownies were born.  It is a favorite in our house, and will be in yours, too.  So hop on that bike and head to the store, because you will need:

14oz package of soft caramel candies

1/2c. evaporated milk

1c of butter

2c white sugar

2tsp vanilla

4 eggs

1 1/4c flour

3/4c unsweetened cocoa powder

1/4tsp salt

2 cups chocolate pieces - milk or semi sweet

1 1/2c chopped pecans

Heat oven to 350F.  In a small saucepan melt the caramels over low heat with the evaporated milk. Stir frequently.

Melt butter in medium saucepan over low heat, blend in sugar, vanilla and eggs. Stir in flour, cocoa and salt, mix well stir in 1 1/2 cups of chocolate chunks and 1 cup of the pecans. Spoon and spread in greased 9x13" pan

Gently and evenly drizzle the caramel mixture over the batter to prevent large pockets from reaching the bottom of the bars. (caramel can cover entire surface )

Bake 35-40 minutes until set

In small saucepan, melt remaining choc chips/chunks with small amount of vegetable fat (veggie oil or crisco) over low heat, stir until smooth. Drizzle over warm brownies. Sprinkle remaining pecans over top, press in lightly. Cool 20 minutes, refrigerate for an hour and a half or until chocolate is set.

If refrigerated longer, let stand at room temp for 20 minutes prior to serving.

So delicious, you'll be accused of sorcery!

Amazon Strikes Again

Check out this amazon.com listing.

I know, I know, you're probably just thinking "Wow, Saki, that's an ugly shirt."  Trust me, dearest blogfans, I thought the same thing.

Have a second look, this time paying close attention to the "Customers who viewed this item also viewed" section, and the Customer Reviews.

You're welcome.

Just wanted to say

Happy birthday to my Lovely Lauren!!

Go give her birthday wishes!

Cooking With Saki

Hi kids!  Today, we're going to make Coconut Curry Chicken.  Don't be scared, it's not as difficult as it sounds and it's so delicious my three year old even eats it (and it's a well known fact that she survives on air, and capri sun pouches).  So, step into your flip flops and head to the store, because you will need:

1 c. coconut milk

2 TBL chopped fresh cilantro

2 tsp. red curry paste

1/2 tsp. brown sugar

1 red bell pepper, sliced

1 bag fresh baby spinach (about 4 cups, give or take)

2 boneless skinless chicken breasts

salt and pepper to taste

Whisk coconut milk, cilantro, curry paste and brown sugar together in a bowl.  Cut the chicken breasts into medallions and salt and pepper as you see fit.  If you're feeling adventurous, sprinkle some red pepper flake in there, or a little ground cayenne.  Cook the chicken in a skillet with some extra virgin olive oil.  Once the chicken is cooked throughout, add sauce and red pepper.  Once sauce is bubbly, and the red pepper begins to soften, add the spinach and cover, cooking just until wilted.  Give it a final stir, and enjoy :)

The Story of Stuff

Are you a pothead, Focker?

Apparently, you are.

I have a tracker on my blog, that allows me to see how people found it - a link from somewhere else, a google search, a blog search, and so on and so forth.  

The number one way that people find my blog, is by googling "Hungry, Happy, Sleepy," from the infamous Katt Williams weed rants.  Over 70% of the visitors to my blog found it by looking for stand up skits about MJ.  

Further proving my point that you guys are a bunch of stoners - Aside from looking for tidbits about the ganja, you have also googled the following and somehow found me:

Bed hair  (what??)

Thompson Creek Window Fuck (I give you credit, that's probably pretty legit)

The Saga of Baba Fats (Oh Shel Silverstein, how I love thee)

Captain Crunch Cheerios (These do not exist in real life.  Go look for munchies somewhere else.)

I mean, come on now, kids.  Bed hair?  Ew.  Don't google bed hair (stop it.  I know you're all opening up a new window to go google it).  

I have also ascertained that you are very interested in seeing pictures of motorcycles.  The picture you are painting of yourselves, dear Blog Readers, is slightly disturbing.  

Quickly now, get your pitchforks and torches

10 REASONS WE SHOULD NOT ALLOW GAY MARRIAGE IN AMERICA

1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay.  It will do so in the same way that hanging around left-handed people will make you left-handed.

3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all.  Clearly,  women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed. The sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children.  We know this is fact, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society.  We could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

Kids Speak

Cecilia:  Mommy, is Big Bird a boy, or a girl?

Saki:  Um, a boy.  I think.  Yeah, definitely boy.

Cecilia:  And Mommy is a girl.  And Daddy is a boy.  And Mima is a girl.

Saki:  That's right.  

Cecilia:  Mima has big nurses.  YaYa is a girl, too.  She has very big nurses.  *Cecilia lifts up her shirt and pinches her nipple*  Celia is a girl, but I have itty bitty teeny tiny nurses.

A Night in the Life

12 midnight - Head to bed after a 16 hour day that included breakfast with the inlaws, throwing a birthday party for Cecilia and her friends, hosting my family back at the house, having the kids across the street over for three hours to play, and cleaning up messes of the aforementioned events.

12:45am - Corral husband back into bed after a dream that sent him running and yelling into the hallway, looking for intruders

1:15 am - Clean up vomit from Cecilia's bed, hair, face and clothes.  Put her to sleep in my room.

1:25 am - Throw all vomitous laundry into the washer after shaking the particularly chunky sheets outside.

1:35 am - Crawl back into bed, jockeying for space in the queen size bed amongst my husband, my three year old and my infant 

1:50 am - Wake to Cecilia screaming and hold vomit bucket and her hair back as she gets sick.  Repeat 1:15, 1:25 and 1:35's events again.

2:30 am - And again

3:10 am - And again

3:55 am - And again.

4:10 am - Lucas wakes up, wanting to nurse, and realizes his sister is in the bed.  Spend the next 20 minutes trying to keep Lucas from kicking Sissy in the back or pulling her hair.

4:30 am - Everyone in the bed finally falls asleep

5:30 am - Alarm goes off